Celestial Navigation secrets revealed

Soon another group of sailors will learn the secret truth of celestial navigation. In only four weeks, in Marion, Mass. on April 10 and 11, an eager group of initiates will learn the astounding truth. They will be required to swear oaths of silence, of course. We can’t have them divulging the mystic secrets that all celestial navigators have known and practiced forever. (Okay, just between us, I’ll let you in on the secret: celestial navigation is easy and fun. But please don’t tell anyone. We don’t want to ruin celestial’s intimidating reputation built up over centuries.) For a chance to learn this ancient art, contact our Ocean Navigator School of Seamanship and sign up. (Bring your own brimstone.)